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| Cheryl (Granddaughter), Audrey Roth and Dale (Son) |
About Audrey
Roth, our mom.
The morning
Mom died I wrote this in her honor.
Mom's foremost
place in life was to see God. When she
was baptized at the age of twelve she believed she would see heaven
someday. She lived her life in a way
that satisfied not only her husband but she believed it met approval by our
Father in Heaven. She feared God and
lived a life of dedication to those who surrounded her. She told me one day after some kind of
argument we were having that the man sitting in the living room, "He is
very precious to me." She was
speaking of Dad. I never knew them to
have cross words except one time when I was a child. Dad and I were getting ready to go to Monroe
County, Ohio, to haul home a load of locust fence posts. She kept persisting by asking dad over and
over as he proceeded from the house to the truck when did he intend on
returning. My father never liked to be
bothered with something that would impede his honesty, and so he said, "When
I get back."
Dad always
protected her from knowing things that would cause her embarrassment if someone
did ask her about certain details pertaining to the church. This became important when he served as an
Elder. He never wanted to jeopardize her
position as an Elder's wife by telling her things that may dishonor her. I know of men who tell their wives everything
whether they be preachers or elders. Not
Dad. He did this to protect her from
telling a lie. If she didn't hear it
then she must be telling the truth as was his firm belief to protect her. I truly believe he emulated Mom to how Christ
loved the church and gave himself for it.
Mom believed
wholeheartedly in what the Bible said about the older ladies teaching the
younger women to become better wives to their husbands. So often today this is not practiced as some
go to the younger and inexperienced to get advice. She often discussed certain issues with me
after dad's passing. She would see
someone struggling with their life and pinpoint the problem, but only after
some consideration on her part. Then
after a time of study and thought she would offer up some advice that sounded
like it came directly from God. She
would share her idea of what must be done to solve the issue. There were some who came to her door to seek
counsel. She would listen to them pour
out their heart and, being a patient woman to those who sought her advice,
waited until they were through. And only
when they asked for her advice did she then provide it.
One of her
favorite periods in life was teaching four and five year olds. Mom often made up her own Bible class
material so it could be used over and over again after she completed a
cycle. It was such a joy to her that she
would converse with me during a meal after she had taught her favorite pupils
on Sunday morning. Her eyes lit up as
she described in detail about a particular character in the Old or New
Testament. One of her favorites was
Zacchaeus who climbed up into sycamore tree because he was small in
stature. Some of her students would
question if it was believable about a small man wanting to see Jesus. Some got very excited as their hands flew
towards the heavens as they wanted to answer during her inquisitive interview.
Mom was very
patient with people. She was not always
like this until she worked in one family's home in Rittman, Ohio, who liked to
entertain. Somehow, she overcame her
shyness by learning how to speak openly with people. When Mom and dad started dating her
bashfulness often got in the way. She
was very much afraid to eat in front of someone she didn't know. And when he offered her an ice cream cone she
refused to eat it. Little by little she
overcame this drawback and moved forward by going to people to get better
acquainted. It didn't bother her any
longer as others were sometimes as shy with what she had struggled with for so
many years. Mom became a people person
by listening first before speaking affectionately. I never heard her say a bad word about anyone
unless they upset her so - that afterwards she tested her tongue first before
making a final comment.
I think her
secret breakthrough was her smile when she made inroads in getting to know
people. She displayed her kindness in
many ways. She openly invited anyone
into her home. She loved to invite
preachers in for a meal until she could no longer handle the chore of preparing
a large meal. Whether it bothered her to
stop because of her weak arms and legs she just didn't say. But it was always a feast to eat well and
discuss with one another about so many important things that she loved. She was always interested in the preacher's
family and how well they were doing while he was away from them. She had a great respect for preachers of the
gospel. And preparing this special feast
would take her all day to get the meal on for the arriving preacher at
five. Once we were discussing this particular
thing and she said, "I wished I had kept a book of every preacher who
had visited us."
For years she
made her own clothes. I would hear her
sewing machine whirling away to complete her desired find. She loved to make colorful clothes that fit her
personality. And I think she did this to
please the one she loved, her husband, our dad.
And to see Dad watch for his lovely bride march out in something new
that she had custom-made with her own hands delighted him all the more. There was that special gleam that appeared
when she showed off her latest creation without being a majestic woman.
I think the
Christmas holidays were her favorite time of the year. Box after box was carried downstairs to be
emptied of ornaments and doodads and then they were placed throughout the house
which made it come alive with holiday cheer.
Sometimes it took two days to complete this yearly task, but she loved
every minute of it as she labored to decorate while working all of her other
chores into the lot. Christmas cards had
to be sent. When receiving cards from
others she marked it off in her special book to be reminded again of those who
had sent cards from the year before. I
remember one certain address book having enough columns for at least ten years.
I was happy to
take care of her after I moved back home.
It wasn't something I had chosen to do, but a preacher friend told me
after the sad ordeal happened in my life, that maybe it was a God-send to go
back home again. And so it worked out in
their favor when Dad took ill in 2009.
Yes, I was tied down, but that didn't bother me as my age kept me close
to home. Some days I would have to go
out to get something she demanded, and I went.
There were times when the electric fence needed mending, or something else
that drew my attention, and so I would be out for a while, not knowing where
she would be when I returned. Whenever I
had to get some things which were needed for the farm my prayer was she
wouldn't be out in the garden when I arrived home. And usually the next day she would tell what
she had been doing while I was gone. She
asked me one day how I liked her geraniums.
Since she didn't like how I weeded them she took pleasure in doing it
herself, even at the ripe old age of 93.
She was a
great mom who loved her position in life as a homemaker. She looked forward to ironing clothes. It was an obsession to her on wash day to get
the clean washed clothes out of the basement and iron them. I even questioned her why she had such
passion for this dreary job. To her it
was pure joy to work for her family because of her willingness as a mother and
a wife. She wanted her family to have
pressed clothes without wrinkles. I
believe it made her proud whenever I stood before the congregation to lead
singing with a neatly pressed shirt. I
don't know to this day how she got four children fed and ready for church come
Sunday morning since we were farmers.
Not a thing was out of place when we entered the meeting house to
worship God. She made her family into
something perhaps so they could better serve God by being prepared with neat
and clean clothes. It wasn't the clothes
per se, but the attitude of her heart.
She told me
about her time of living during the Great Depression by draping a cloth over an
orange crate in her bedroom. Whenever
her father brought home a crate of oranges and after it was emptied she would
take it to her bedroom to use as furniture.
She was eight years old. She
always wanted things orderly no matter what was under the cloth. To her it was making a home while being a
child yet she continued the practice after she married, but moved on to better
things besides an orange crate.
At one time
her present home occupied over fifty potted plants known to those whoever
visited and saw her African violets.
Just watering them sometimes took an hour or more. The grandchildren brag about her many plants
in that they refuse to die while being in her possession. Just by the feel of one of her crooked
fingers pressed lightly against the soft soil she knew how much water to pour
onto and around the plant. Every spring
she formed new plants by breaking off a piece from an old one. Her geraniums were always special to her as
she wanted them outside come spring time.
Then when it came time to replant the geraniums in the garden they had
to be carried from the house and put in holes she often dug herself, because no
one other than her knew the exact spacing of her plants. Along the lower edge of the small garden
stood her red geraniums like suited solders standing at attention.
Hospitality
never met a stranger in our home. When
she knew company was coming frozen pies were carried up from one of the deep
freezes in the basement and baked to perfection. Those who visited often complimented her on
her special pie baking. Last year before
the Thanksgiving holidays she had made close to a dozen pies and froze
them. When she wasn't making pies then
she made time to bake cookies. Mom and I
loved to study over recipes and compare notes on what was best suited for the
table. Sometimes we didn't always agree
on how a recipe is to be measured out.
While I didn't pay particular attention to detail Mom always used her
measuring tools precisely to get what she so desired for the finished product.
At one time
and this was early as we were living on the farm, Mom baked bread every
Saturday. It had to last seven
days. The kitchen came alive with fresh
smells as it drafted throughout the house.
Her last specialty on baking day was her coffee cake. It was something we always looked forward to
Sunday morning. The coffee was put on
and each child gathered to their spot at the table. Mom cut the coffee cake equally and passed
the dish around before each of us. We
each took a piece and savored the moment to begin eating. My brother and I were about ten and eight and
only on Sunday morning were we allowed coffee to dip our coffee cake in
to. Of course, Dad had showed us how to
squeeze out the coffee from the long piece of coffee cake by using a fork
before eating it. What a blessed time to
be small, yet relish in a feast that brings about wonderful memories.
Mom looked
forward to those who were tying the knot.
Traveling cross country to attend someone's wedding became tedious as
she aged. She never gave up because of
her strong will to survive until she couldn't do it any longer. She never seemed out of place and she always
knew her place. She once told me the
story about her sassing her father during a meal before she married dad. The man sitting next to her kicked her and
said nothing contrary to her hurt leg.
This very incident happened before they married in 1941. Dad truly believed in honoring your parents
even if they sometimes spoke out of turn.
So, when she spoke against her father her leg got the message right
quick. Never again did she speak in such
a way to dishonor her parents. Although,
I find this incident funny, our young people today need to take lessons from
those who have received the hard knocks, and at all cost honor those who have
given birth because of their love for them.
I believe it is a disgrace when young people forget about those who
raised them to become adults. Honor them
now or regret the day you were born with shame.
Mom
wholeheartedly believed in prayer. She
believed the Heaven Father was always listening. During the days of the Vietnam crisis as my
brother and I had been drafted she prayed nightly that we would not go to
war. After I returned home did she tell
of this ordeal that kept her awake many a night. Prayer was always close to her heart when Dad
became ill. She told me one morning as
we headed to the hospital to visit him - she said this, "He will outlive
me." I knew the writing was on
the wall that he wouldn't last, but in her heart he was her keeper for
life. What a great lesson to learn why
we should never take life for granted, nor should we give up so easily.
Quilting being
seasonal was usually set up during the fall and right before the Thanksgiving
holidays. Mom would get out her
dilapidated frames which were over a hundred years old and place them by the
dining room front window. She would have
a quilting day assigned one day a week by inviting others to help. Then with age she couldn't do the job any
longer because of her bad arms. The
crooked fingers didn't slow her down but her arms and shoulders failed her if
she worked for long periods. For two
years my niece Jenny would be by her side learning the tight stitching that
made a quilt beautiful. My grandmother
had a tight stitch of 12 stitches to an inch which made the patterns not so
durable when handling or washing. They
constantly had to remind her about her tight stitching.
The following
verses fit my departed mother to a tee.
Whether she read these verses during her life it is something probably
hidden within her heart and not to be discussed by those who remain. From the book of Proverbs 31 we start with
verse 10 using the NASV, "An
excellent wife, who can find? For her
worth is far above jewels. The heart of
her husband trusts in her, And he will have no lack of gain. She does him good
and not evil All the days of her life.
She looks for wool and flax And works with her hands in delight. She is like merchant ships; She brings her
food from afar. She rises also while it
is still night and gives food to her household And portions to maidens. She considers a field and buys it; From her
earnings she plants a vineyard. She
girds herself with strength And makes her arms strong. She senses that her gain is good; Her lamp
does not go out at night. She stretches
out her hands to the distaff, And her hands grasp the spindle. She extends her hand to the poor, And she
stretches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of the snow for her household, For all her household
are clothed with scarlet. She makes
coverings for herself; Her clothing is fine linen and purple." Continuing with verse 25 and 26. "Strength and dignity are her
clothing, And she smiles at the future.
She opens her mouth in wisdom, And the teaching of kindness is on her
tongue."
There are many
other things I could say, but this is enough to get past the memories which
will remain.
I wrote this
in case someone couldn't fill the spot I heaved upon Don Cooper. I'm so glad he agreed to speak wise words to
those left behind. Hopefully, it will
bring about results for the sake of Christ and His church.
Dale L Roth
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